Things they don't tell you when you get engaged.
This whole process I have relied on advice from previous brides, family members, blogs, books, you name I've read it. And yet, there are quite a few things they don't tell you about getting married in good ole' Southern Weddings Magazine.
1) Marriage is hard. Really hard- and we're not even married yet! Now I understand why they say marriage is one of the biggest ministries that you can have on this earth, and quite frankly it is one of the toughest. Sure, you're not reaching billions of people and sharing the gospel to nonbelievers, but what you are doing is trying your very best not to kill your significant other before the day ends. And if you are successful in not committing murder, that in itself is a testimony. What? lets just be real here, we all know it's true. No matter how in love you are with them.
2) You will ALWAYS fight about money. No matter the size of the fight, it happens. We're human. I have always been really good with my money, I've always had a job or three. I have always had freedom with my money because I managed it so well. I knew exactly what bills I had to pay, and I knew exactly what I had left to spend, and I always, always had plenty of cushion left in my account. When you get married, or like in our case getting married, things change. And if I am being really honest, that scares me. We both have really great jobs, especially for our age, but we also have a lot of bills as well. And even though we don't live together yet, we still have to pay those bills together. Which is another task in itself. The hardest part of it is trying to be thankful for what we do have rather than what we don't. I complain all the time about spending my money on things like running water, electricity, even gas in our cars and I am ever so kindly reminded that at least I have these things, that there are so many other people worse off than I am. So make the best of it, share that dollar double cheeseburger and free water like it's the best meal you've ever eaten.
3) Wedding planning is not as fun as it looks. I have to say I have thoroughly enjoyed wedding planning. I really have. Everyone has been so helpful, all the ladies in my family are pros at this wedding stuff and they have been so helpful. It really has been a breeze, but to say it was all that I imagined and more may be stretching it a little. It is difficult planning a wedding. All our big concerns were just great food and a good time. I really haven't been too picky otherwise. And I refuse to get stressed out about it. If at the end of the day I am married to Sam, than it will have all went perfectly. However if your goal is to have the biggest and best wedding anyone has ever been to, you're going to be a tad disappointed. There will always be something newer, something bigger, and something better. So when you plan your wedding, make it all about you and your better half.
4) It is all about compromise. This is the one I struggle with. I am a very independent person. I like things done my way. But getting married is all about compromise and working together. We are working on this everyday and I know we will only get better once we tie the knot.
5) Enjoy each other is easier said than done. This is one that we are working on as well, and I know once we are living together it will become a lot easier, but it is so hard. When we finally get to spend time with each other it is either wedding talk, or its something about sports. Having to remember to take time just to enjoy each others company is a big thing to do in a marriage. I need his time, and he needs mine. Remember this always.
That's all I've got for today. I am so excited to start this journey with Sam as his wife. I know it will be difficult, but I also know that it will be worth it. I hope that I continue to learn and be challenged as the Lord takes us through life together.
1) Marriage is hard. Really hard- and we're not even married yet! Now I understand why they say marriage is one of the biggest ministries that you can have on this earth, and quite frankly it is one of the toughest. Sure, you're not reaching billions of people and sharing the gospel to nonbelievers, but what you are doing is trying your very best not to kill your significant other before the day ends. And if you are successful in not committing murder, that in itself is a testimony. What? lets just be real here, we all know it's true. No matter how in love you are with them.
2) You will ALWAYS fight about money. No matter the size of the fight, it happens. We're human. I have always been really good with my money, I've always had a job or three. I have always had freedom with my money because I managed it so well. I knew exactly what bills I had to pay, and I knew exactly what I had left to spend, and I always, always had plenty of cushion left in my account. When you get married, or like in our case getting married, things change. And if I am being really honest, that scares me. We both have really great jobs, especially for our age, but we also have a lot of bills as well. And even though we don't live together yet, we still have to pay those bills together. Which is another task in itself. The hardest part of it is trying to be thankful for what we do have rather than what we don't. I complain all the time about spending my money on things like running water, electricity, even gas in our cars and I am ever so kindly reminded that at least I have these things, that there are so many other people worse off than I am. So make the best of it, share that dollar double cheeseburger and free water like it's the best meal you've ever eaten.
3) Wedding planning is not as fun as it looks. I have to say I have thoroughly enjoyed wedding planning. I really have. Everyone has been so helpful, all the ladies in my family are pros at this wedding stuff and they have been so helpful. It really has been a breeze, but to say it was all that I imagined and more may be stretching it a little. It is difficult planning a wedding. All our big concerns were just great food and a good time. I really haven't been too picky otherwise. And I refuse to get stressed out about it. If at the end of the day I am married to Sam, than it will have all went perfectly. However if your goal is to have the biggest and best wedding anyone has ever been to, you're going to be a tad disappointed. There will always be something newer, something bigger, and something better. So when you plan your wedding, make it all about you and your better half.
4) It is all about compromise. This is the one I struggle with. I am a very independent person. I like things done my way. But getting married is all about compromise and working together. We are working on this everyday and I know we will only get better once we tie the knot.
5) Enjoy each other is easier said than done. This is one that we are working on as well, and I know once we are living together it will become a lot easier, but it is so hard. When we finally get to spend time with each other it is either wedding talk, or its something about sports. Having to remember to take time just to enjoy each others company is a big thing to do in a marriage. I need his time, and he needs mine. Remember this always.
That's all I've got for today. I am so excited to start this journey with Sam as his wife. I know it will be difficult, but I also know that it will be worth it. I hope that I continue to learn and be challenged as the Lord takes us through life together.
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